Something Just for Me

Ah Ha I've found it... something just for me... ZUMBA! OK yes I know I am a bit behind and everyone has been doing this for a long time already but I finally experienced it for myself yesterday. I have to say after just one class, I just might be hooked! Heres my plug for a HS friend... Avenue to Broadway in Lakehurst NJ, Mondays at 645 and Thursdays at 630... the instructor was great. For my first time I didn't feel lost with the routine, he makes it easy to follow and is not overly complicated but it was an AMAZING workout!!! I haven't sweated like that, probably since a high school field hockey game! If you love to dance and want to burn a lot of calories in just an hour... definitely check it out!

Its so easy to kind of forget about taking care of yourself when you have a little one at home, everything becomes about making sure that they are taken care of and happy. I really do think that all us mommies need some time away to reenergize and to make sure that we too are happy and less stressed. Getting out for a little while just to do something that makes me feel good inside and out is great and I am so glad that I enjoyed it as much as I did. The music pumping, dancing, sweating... I really did feel good afterwards... a boost of energy! I never have been a gym person, I get so bored doing those machines, watching everyone else and my mind wonders and I keep thinking about that good ol' list of things to do. Zumba didn't let me think about anything but the steps, getting it somewhat right and not making a fool of myself. It was exhausting and a little painful at times but so worth it!

My goal... twice a week zumba class, once a week bike ride around the reservoir and maybe some walking in between. Its been over a year and I've been not feeling thrilled about the post baby body (yes I admit, I really haven't done anything to change it up until yesterday) and I'm hoping to lose 15 pounds by the end of summer... I think thats a realistic goal... I'm tired of feeling tired and sluggish and I'm really hoping this does the trick! Now I must keep with it!!! Will keep you posted on my progress.

Jacks Show Day

January 22nd, Jack had his trial class at the Little Gym. At this point he was only crawling and certainly towered over at the class. The age group is 10-19 months, Jack was just over 8 months at the time. It was funny because most of the kids were running around, tumbling and playing... then there was Jack. During the warm up walk while all the kids ran in a circle, I held Jack and we walked. While a seated activity was going on there were some kids running to the play area while Jack just sat and observed everything going on around him. While all the kids were climbing and tumbling all over the play area, Jack enjoyed hanging out in the center of the big "donut". The moment that shocked me was when, with the assistance of the teacher, he held on to the parallel bar by himself for a good 10-15 seconds! My strong little guy! Granted he cried at the end of it and didn't want to grab on afterwards... he had the cutest look on his face... I was so proud of him!


Here we are months later, Jack is 13 months, running, tumbling, climbing and having a ball! Today at the gym is his first show day... meaning friends and family can come on in and watch the special class. The theme, Hawaiian so of course Jack, Steve and I will all be wearing our authentic clothes from Hawaii (thank you to my parents... though the bonus would have been if they brought us with them). My mom will be the only one there today that hasn't yet come to a class and I'm sure she will get a kick out of him!

That music starts going and so does Jack... my son is certainly not a shy little guy... he tends to be one of the only ones standing and in the center of the group bouncing to the music. So I mentioned that during the seated activities at the first class Jack just sat and observed... well not anymore! He is now one of the crazy energetic ones that doesn't want to sit still so yes I spend a good portion of the warm up time just chasing him around to attempt to get him to do the activity on the big mat. He is now able to climb all over everything and has learned at the gym how to shimmy himself off of things and now does it at home
on the couch and our bed. He is amazingly strong and I love watching him develop physically and to interact with the other kids!


Again, I know, it amazes me how things have changed just in the past few months and I know that by the end of the summer session he will be accomplishing even more!! It is a great opportunity for both os us to get out and do something active together... Jack loves it! Its so funny how after the trial class I knew it was something I wanted to do with him but there was that little bit of hesitation in me because he was so much younger and less mobile then all the other kids at the time but I am so glad we started when we did, its been a wonderful experience for us both!

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Dear Daddy

((Steves First Fathers Day))

Jack can't yet express his gratitude for his daddy so I figured I'd give it a try for him.

Yesterday was Steves 2nd Fathers Day and wow what a difference a year makes. Last year Jack was just over a month old and now here we are at 13 months! We figured out that what Jack babbles to Steve is "bubba" instead of dada (Steve calls Jack bubba and we are pretty sure that is what Jack has been calling him!). A very cute bonus on fathers day and yes Jack does actually respond correctly when dada is mentioned, so he's not actually completely confused. Jack is very much a little man now and I think Steve is really enjoying the time with him now. Not saying he didn't adore him any less but I think the mommies tend to adore the cuddle time and gazes of a newborn and the daddies tend to love when play time is possible. Steve will be the first to tell you that it is a ton of fun but so much more exhausting now, yes even with the extra sleep we now get.

Steve was always a great boyfriend, is a wonderful husband and is an amazing dad!! Who knew that a person that had never even held a baby before would have picked it all up as quickly as he did. He was our rock at the hospital when Jack was born and in weeks following at home while I was recovering from the c-section. Steve has stepped up for both of us and Jack and I couldn't ask for a better guy!

Jack gets the biggest smile when daddy walks through the door at the end of the work day and I think the feeling of happiness is mutual. You can tell by Steves look that he is equally as happy to be home and to see that beautiful boys face! Watching them play together melts my heart and especially the way they can make each other laugh, it is truly precious!

So here it is... if Jack could talk this is what I think he'd say... Dear Daddy... thank you for loving me, even when I'm not listening and hitting the kitty with my golf club... thank you for showing me how to hold a golf club and hockey stick... thank you for the silly tickle fingers... thank you for the hugs and kisses... thanks for playing with me and making me laugh... thanks for doing lots of fun stuff with me and mommy... thanks for being the best daddy ever! I love you!

Its all about making memories and above all putting our family and love for each other first... everything else will fall into place! Thank you Steve, my best friend for nearly 12 years, my husband for nearly 3 years and for being a wonderful daddy for 13 months (and counting...)!

Where are you Money Tree?

I think most people would agree that they are totally feeling the pinch lately... we are no different! I am in search of that good ole money tree! Things just can't seem to go in our favor lately and its getting frustrating as can be! Yes I admit that I easily get anxious when it comes to the finances but ugh, something has go to give here!

Lately I feel like we take one step forward and three back. The good news, no fantastic news... Steve received a letter in the mail this week stating that the Board of Architects have approved his application and he is officially a licensed landscape architect (just waiting on the fancy wall license and press). This alone would generally be a great thing not only for Steve and his career but for our family. Unfortunately this doesn't look like its going to change anything. Basically the sheer fact that he is now licensed should automatically mean a decent raise but the way the company and economy is going he's lucky just to have a job. A raise definitely would have helped, especially since I am not working. I pray that I am wrong and once that fancy certificate and press arrive that something will change but we shall see.

Next, we applied for that whole mortgage readjustment thing and we were denied again, yes we've tried twice! It is so frustrating because we had sucky timing and bought our place right before everything went to *hit meaning our house is no where near being worth what we paid. It really isn't fun to be paying all this money for something that isn't even worth it anymore... and the way things are going who knows how long its going to take to get back. This of course ties into the whole wanting to move but not being able to.

I don't know what it is. We aren't huge spenders, though our vice is eating out at awesome restaurants, and yet the bills keep piling up... mostly gas and groceries which you can't exactly eliminate. I rarely go shopping for myself, its generally just the necessities for Jack. This month is killer also... parties and fathers day... all requiring gifts. I hate that I feel guilt just because I buy something for myself... must say it was much easier when I had a job that paid a bunch of cash but that was a long time ago and here we are struggling like so many people, frustrated with the situation and slightly clueless on how to fix it. We'll keep chugging along and pray that things take a turn for the better soon!

BTW... how adorable is that new picture of Jack!!! He is entered into the Parents Magazine 2010 Cover Contest! Fingers crossed... besides the cover of the November issue of Parents Magazine... I lovely college fund is included! Hey, you gotta be in it to win it!

A Great Weekend

This past weekend was a busy, but wonderful one. We started with Steves hockey game, went onto an engagement party, late night Pete and Eldas and to end it was the Belmar Seafood Festival.

Steve started playing hockey again, on a team with my brothers and their friends. Now I must first mention that when they tried this organized league thing a few years ago, they lost every single game they played, being mercied for a majority of them. Lets just say it was terrible to watch! So far this time around, a whole different story! They have actually won their first two games! Must say Jack loves to watch lives sports! Being that I was the only spectator this Friday, Jack actually sat in his stroller and watched the entire game... amazing what is possible when he isn't all distracted. You should hear how he screams while the game is going on and how cute it is that is constantly waving to all the players... he is Mitsubarus biggest fan! Then after the game when all the guys come out and plop their bags and sticks down... Jack helps himself to the sticks and walks around swinging... the next pro for sure! We are very excited that a good number of the games are at 7pm so Jack can watch his daddy play!

Saturday was the big celebration... Dom (my brother) and Jens Engagement Party!!! For anyone that has had to plan a big important event, you know that almost never does it go off without at least one little mishap... this one was that Jen showed up a bit late because of a hair appointment... happens to the best of us and it always ends up being a fun story later on. Besides that the day was perfect... they both looked wonderful and their friends and family were there to celebrate their love with them! We are so excited for them.... Jack had fun too! Of course he is only one so he spent probably a quarter of the time walking around outside. He is so cute though... will eat just about anything you give to him... before the meal he snacked on grano padano, bread and fried zucchini.((On a side note... Jack eats just about anything at this point, even organic skinless hot dogs, except for fish, honey and nuts... he is a great eater and his favorite food groups are definitely carbs and fruit! He loves strawberries, melon, nectarines, cherries...)) Of course by time dinner same, it was 3 which meant Jack was keeping to schedule and showed no interest in eating but went down for a nap in no time. I must say... Jack was looking wonderful at this party... wearing a four piece Nautica outfit... dress pants, button down shirt, vest and tie... by the way we got a coordinating outfit for Steve... SO CUTE! It was a great party.. they did a wonderful job planning!

Saturday after the party we headed home to give Jack dinner and then called Steves mom to come babysit the munchkin... we headed to the beach where some of the guys were surfing... and as usual by time we get there, they are packing up to leave... instead of ending the night there... we went to Pete and Eldas, which I haven't been to since I was pregnant... it was delish but starting to question whether my stomach can handle late night grease the way it used to be... We had some good laughs!!

Sunday we took Jack to the seafood festival... no worries we fed him before hand figuring it wouldn't be easy to find him something to eat there... It was so hot out but jack was a trooper! He took a nice long walk on the boardwalk with Nana and Papa while we ate our lunch. Then to cool down some Jack had a little sampling of a strawberry banana smoothie and orange cream smoothie... go figure that he liked it... shouldn't be surprised really....

It was a good weekend! Of course Monday creeps up way too quickly and its back to the daily routine things. I am so glad though, that Jack while he probably doesn't quite understand whats going on, he is experiencing lots of different things! He is great in all situations and it makes it that much easier to go out anywhere.

So a little update on Jack... he turned 13 months on Saturday! He is not only walking now but is getting faster and faster. He cracks us up as well as himself! He loves to play and laugh... He is understanding more and more everyday... while he still ignores when we say NO he does respond when we ask him to get a specific item. He knows when I am making him lunch and ask if he wants t sit in his chair he walks over to his high chair... So cute, he now says BOO back to us when playing peek a boo, which happens to be a favorite game of his. He plays with his hands or a book and he finds it hysterical! He is eating and sleeping great. His sleeping schedule has been working out great... 9am and 3pm are nap time and 730/8pm is bedtime... he is so much happier during the day and waking up in a great mood... we should all try to get some extra sleep! Jack is a doll... Steve and I are enjoying this playful stage!

Oh Canada!

Canada here we come.... Jack and I will be traveling sooner then expected. My Canadian cousin is getting married next month and Jack and I are attending. Very bummed because Steve can't come with us, not enough vacation time with the cruise in October, so its just the two of us.

So while there is going to be a ton of family attending, its just going to be me, Jack and my mom flying out to Toronto. I must admit I am a bit nervous and uncertain... I debated whether I should even go since Steve couldn't come but we rarely get to see this side of the family, its been way too long and no one has met Jack yet and I have not met Nolan (my cousins son) yet. Steve said he was fine with us going so I decided to make the trek! I considered for a brief moment driving up, but 9 hours in the car with just me and my mom driving and the Jack... I think it would be way too crazy so we opted to fly... I got our tickets yesterday!

The nerves come in here... first time away from home with Jack (not counting a night over at Steve's dads or a day at my grandparents), we're going from Thursday to Monday so yea a decent trip! So back to nerves... first time away so I have to certainly make a packing list for Jacks stuff, then there is the whole flying thing... it will be his first time on a plane and my first time flying without Steve (btw my mom is the worst to fly with... she is not a fan). If anyone has tips on comforting a baby on a plane, please send them my way!! I'm all worried about the pressure and the pain he will feel then the fact that if he is unhappy and crying everyone on the plane will be hating me. Yea its only a 2 hour flight but I feel like it could feel like 6 hours if Jack doesn't sleep some.

It will also be interesting how I manage to keep Jack on somewhat of a schedule so he gets enough rest to not be cranky. How is he going to sleep since its not going to be his room and his crib... I am hoping that someone there has an extra car seat and pack and play so I don't have to fly with all that stuff.

Besides all the nervousness about the unknown of traveling with Jack, I am super thrilled I decided to go! I cannot wait to see all the family and for all the family to meet Jack! We missed the last Canadian wedding because we were on our honeymoon and then a reunion because we were in Italy again. Sigh... I love traveling! Should be a blast with my little munchkin as my wedding date! Details of course will follow...

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Damn you NJ

I know there are plenty of you that love living in NJ, especially this time of year with all the beach activity... me on the other hand couldn't care less... I am not a beach person what so ever so the big draw that people have to NJ is so not my thing...

I so badly wish we were elsewhere, for so many reasons. We've been talking again lately about the whole idea of moving. We both agree that at this point neither of us would have any problem moving just over the border to PA. Close enough that visiting family is easy enough but out of this money sucking ugly state ((sorry to those o you that see beauty here, I just don't see it)). For several nights last week I played around on the realtor.com app in search of homes... got to say it is so frustrating to see what you can get for your money just an hour away. Heres the problem though, we bought our townhouse right before the market went to to shit, so here we are stuck at the moment. Our house is no longer worth nearly what we paid for it which in turn means if we were to sell now we wouldn't have enough for a down payment on a new home, even if it is cheaper.

So unfortunately right now we will be staying put until the house value returns to at least what we paid. The tough part is that until then we will continue to struggle. Its certainly not easy with just one salary coming in, though neither of us would change the fact that I am home raising Jack. Every month is the same thing... where are we pulling money from to get by.... no matter what, we can't seem to keep the credit card clear (and might I mention that the majority of that is only groceries and gas). I am constantly in disbelief over the amount of money we have to pay this ridiculous town for taxes... we have a townhouse with no land besides our driveway and the tiny plot that the house sits on! It is absurd! Don't get me wrong I do love our house but I am starting to really get the picture that if we had just looked a little further from the family we would have been saving a lot more money!

Lesson learned... we need to start doing what is best for us and not what is just going to please everyone else. Its funny because if you aren't in the same situation its so easy to just say that we can't move because all our family is here... why is it okay that every month we struggle to simply live... and no I'm not denying that our major vice is going out to dinner but honestly going out to dinner a hand full of times is not whats breaking the bank here... we are getting to the point where something has got to give! Hopefully soon the value of the house goes up and we can make a small move for now to test the waters... who knows what will happen at this point... for now we are stuck where we are...

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Now I Understand

Its funny how when we are growing up we don't believe anything anyone tells us and how we question peoples decisions without actually having any experience with what we are judging.... can't say I still don't catch myself judging but maybe I've learned a few things along the way that have made me a bit wiser...

Its easy to judge how someone else deals with parenthood before you have walked in their shoes and now I understand a little better why people may do some of the things they do. I recall having a conversation with a friend about the strict schedule a women had for her child and how it seemed ridiculous to plan everything around a nap time or bedtime. Now I get it, while it may not be the most convenient thing, getting Jack to bed earlier had improved our daily lives and sleep tremendously. So we can't hang out late or go to dinner late... so what... We have am happier, well rested baby which equals a happier and well rested mommy and daddy. Other people looking in may see this as overly rigid but I see it as consistency that leads to a lot less stress!

Another example... We are planning our first family vacation, a 10 day NorthEast cruise. I admit that I am seriously considering getting one of those harness things for Jack. Yup, one of those things that makes your child look like they are on a dog lease. Again, now I get it... for example... on the boat Jack is going to want to walk around, so isn't it safer if I can stop him immediately if need be and when in an area with a lot of people while being within a couple feet of him he is free to walk but I don't have to worry about some crazy grabbing him since he can't run off. My opinion of these things was always, oh how ridiculous is that, the kid looks like a dog... well now that I have Jack it totally makes sense to me.

I understand how it can be so easy to lose your cool when your child is screaming in a restaurant. How you forget that you are surrounded by people and you go ahead and bite off your spouses head not because they did anything wrong but instead because you are in a stressful situation that sometimes gets the best of you for a brief moment.

Now I understand that constant worry about the health, safety and happiness of a child, something I really don't think you can truly appreciate until you are a parent, no matter how many times you are told by your own parents. There is that feeling that you need to be able to provide everything for your child no matter what.

The immediate understanding once your baby is born that that little life is your priority and clothes shopping, nail appointments and 2 week vacations to Europe are no longer the important things in life.

While I can go on and on I guess the point is that we live and learn. There is no way at the age of 12, 15, 17 can you possibly understand where your parents are coming from when they are trying to steer you in the right direction. We all do stupid things and I'm sure we would love to take back now that we know better but its all part of the process... growing up, taking responsibility for our own lives and becoming wiser so that we can one day sound just like our parents did to us...

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